I wanna get personal & super honest with you in this post. You may relate to what I am about to write & this is why I am sharing.
I felt alone for quite some time & maybe you do/did too.
Back in March, which seems like a few years ago now, when the pandemic hit & everything shut down, I went from having a contract fitness business teaching classes across the GTA for teachers, students & people of all abilities to the next day having NO classes to teach anymore.
All of Canada shut down & honestly, I did too for a while….
I kept thinking this was all just temporary so for the time being I may as well eat, drink & enjoy my family time as much as possible….. & I truly did all of that!
As the days turned into weeks that turned into months I began to feel uncomfortable in my own skin for a few reasons.
#1- The “Covid 10-15lbs” were creeping up. Yes! Even us instructors went through this…or at least I did for sure! I went from teaching 5-7 classes a day to 1 – 45 minute class 3 days a week. I was still eating the way I did when my teaching schedule was packed….this was not good news…
#2- I needed/was committed to- providing classes online to my clients/friends on a “Pay what you can system” as I know we are all struggling & I just couldn’t bring myself to ask anyone to “have” to pay when I knew what I had to offer may be just the thing that supports someone from having a complete breakdown OR finding a way to support their family & those around them. I was struggling financially too but for me, fitness provides the happy endorphins needed for our mental health just as much as physical & during these difficult times, I felt it was my job to be kind & understanding to all situations.
#3- The inevitable thought of having to re-evaluate all that I do because in the “new world” that is being created, group fitness & being contracted into schools & such will look very different, if they exist at all.
Life as I have known it to be and/or I would say building it to be literally got hit by semi truck (aka good ol’ covid-19) & will never be the same again.
So where does one go from here?
Well, it has taken me some time to wrap my brain around all of this & to be very honest, everyday I am still wrapping my brain around it all looking for answers.
The first thing that I have done is I realized that if I do not take care of me & work on myself during this time, I am going to fall apart. Not literally but figuratively, yes! I had to find some things for me to do to keep a routine while staying home.
#1 – I started to listen to audiobooks…I highly recommend “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F#%ck”. Good read, especially during these times. It is not saying not to care but to really look at what you are putting your energy towards.
#2 – I downloaded a Tetris game to my phone. Not everything has to be about positivity & bettering one’s self. Although, I would argue that this teaches me to chill out & have patience when I start to get stressed. It allows me to just stop thinking & concentrate on the game.
#3 – I went through my closets & packed up all the clothes that no longer honor my body. My body is changing a lot right now & not just because of the Covid 10-15 lbs. Life changes in men & women occur & if you haven’t experienced it yet…do not worry or feel left out…your time will come!
Trust me…I didn’t think it would happen over here & them BAM! How lucky am I? 😉 See, with clothing, in my experience, it is healthy to purge & reinvent yourself. What was once a tank top you loved, may now feel like an uncomfortable tube top you used to wear as a kid….just toss that thing! No need to hang on hoping that one day you will change your mind & really really want to wear that dang thing again!
#4 – I took my dog Zoey for A LOT of walks….she is a senior so many times I would end up carrying her. I referred to these as my arm toning walks. Lifting 15 lbs around the block…it was worth it! 🙂
#5 – I took on learning new stuff. Mainly around finance because at the end of the day…we all need to know as much as we can about that & in these uncertain times, I really feel it is essential to know how it all works. The good, the bad & often ugly parts of what makes up our economy. I never thought in a million years I would find this fascinating but I really do! I really wish this all got taught in schools!
#6 – I made time for friends. How crazy is this one?? Seriously, I have grown closer with a few new & some very old (not as in old old…just known a long time old) friends. We have standing video calls, hang outs, whatsapp group chats & each & everyone of them I really cherish. I am always astounded that it took a pandemic for me to realize how simple it actually was/is to keep in touch with people!
#7 – I planned elaborate date nights in my home by turning my home into a night club, a mini golf course, got the family involved & they planned murder mystery nights zooming in friends & family, a jamaican restaurant theme night & so much more.
#8 – I started doing other workout videos just recently realizing I wanted more & wanted to push myself. Wow! I am burning through calories, sweating like crazy & having fun again!
In some aspects, I can see that during this pandemic, I got busy LIVING! Like actually LIVING & making time for me which I did not often do. I find that exciting!
The negatives or said another way, the things that still wake me up at 3am come down to not knowing what the future holds around all that I created as a business. All I want to do is support people in finding their happiness through movement. I want to work with people to support them in discovering what lights them up! Have people’s lives be better than before we met by guiding them to have their dreams come true.
I honestly am unclear at the moment how to do this. All I can think in this moment is that being really authentic with you about THAT, may be what supports someone reading this to know that they are not alone.
I appreciate where you are at.
I am thankful for you taking the time to read this & maybe relate.
I am out here looking for what is next on my journey. I am committed to working with people of all abilities to discover their greatness & as my fourth grade teacher Mrs. Kinney said “You CAN DO IT!” attitude!
To wrap this all up I wanted to share with you today because if there is anything we can all do to come together & be great with one another, I hope that being real will open something up for whoever reads this to know that we are all out here just trying to do our best & BE our best these days. While the road looks like it still has some twists & turns in it, I want you to know you can grab my hand at anytime & I will walk with you through it.
We are in this together.
All my love & sincerity,